Social Post September 17, 2014 at 11:58PM

#ProTip: Now this is a big one and one that I do not generally talk about, but I am sharing with you tonight. Gathering good people around you is a skill. I see a lot, a LOT of people on Facebook complaining about how bad people are to them, how they get stabbed in the back, how people let them down, yadda yadda yadda. Not to put too fine a point on it, but that is on you.

Yes, there are people who have issues and may not be the best to associate with. But, those people have tells, they have indicators. If you know how to do it, you can read those indicators and avoid those people. You can develop processes for keeping those people at bay without offending them and without creating conflict.

But, more than that, there are ways to recognize good people. There are ways to bind those good people to you. Charisma is not an inborn trait like many people believe. Charisma is a trained skill, just like accounting or painting. You can learn to make friends and influence people, as they saying goes.

Why do bad people happen to good people? Because the good people are not careful about with whom they associate. I have studied for all of my adult life (and the latter portion of my youthful life) on both how to identify good people and how to gather them around me, reading books, and magazine articles, and research studies, and studying people directly. This is why, no matter how much of a dork I am, the one thing I can always rely on is that I am surrounded by amazing people.

This is what I am telling you, it can be done. You CAN learn how to do it. You do not have to continue the habit of surrounding yourself with damaging people, who hurt you and let you down. But you HAVE to focus on it. You have to understand and admit that you need new knowledge. You have to find that knowledge and study it, learn it, and be willing to adapt your habits. You CAN surround yourself with amazing people, but you HAVE to admit you are doing it wrong and break those habits of being with those who hurt you.

And that is the #ProTip for tonight. via Facebook

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